Sunday, November 25, 2018

A Family Worth Fighting For

As many of you may know by now, we heard the heartbreaking news last week that our adoption match was a scam. I couldn't believe my eyes when I read the email informing us of the FBI investigation, telling us to reach out to some lawyers that we had never spoken with, to receive more information. We had to find the hard facts out for ourselves and determine if this birth mom we had spoken with on the phone was a figment of our imagination.

After some investigation, we were told (and proved it to be true) that our birth mother and baby were completely fabricated and that a woman was hired to speak to us on the phone on different occasions to make us feel safe and secure about the placement. I told this crooked social worker and her accomplice (our "birth mother") how excited we were to be parents, how I was purchasing things for our little girl, preparing her nursery, and that I prayed for them every single day. "Birth mom" even asked me if I was excited to find out that it was a girl and our gender reveal video was shared with our social worker who seemed genuinely excited for us.

I know it is difficult for others to understand, but this was the closest we had ever been to becoming parents. We have been through many fertility treatments but I haven't ever had the privilege of carrying a baby, even for a short amount of time. This baby girl was very real to us and had already taken hold of our hearts. We called her by name and dreamt of what the future held for the three of us.

I will never fully understand why we were chosen to walk this path. Our trust has been severely broken. There have been times that I have cried so hard that it's been difficult to breathe. We had to close the nursery door for a few days so that we would not be reminded of the deep pain we both were feeling.

We have taken some time to grieve our loss and while we are still fighting the gross injustice, heart-wrenching pain, and breach of trust, we are trying to move past this nightmare and fulfill our dream of having a family. We won't let this horrible act discourage us from pursuing our child. God never stopped pursuing us and we refuse to give up. We want our children to know someday without a shadow of a doubt that we loved them fiercely and pursued them with everything we had. Throughout this whole ordeal, I am constantly reminded of the Father's love for us and how He pursues us and loves us with a perfect love. We are his children and He will never stop fighting for us.

Our plan now is to fight for justice. To do everything in our power to get our story out there when we are able to speak out and advocate for adoptive parents, for birth mothers, and for their unborn babies. No one should ever take advantage of some of the most vulnerable people in the world and if they do, they should know that they will pay dearly for their crimes.

We are fighting to try to recover the devastating financial blow that we have been dealt. We are desperately trying to get our money back so that we can continue to pursue adoption. We know our baby is out there and at times we have become so discouraged that this circumstance has delayed our journey to find them.

Just the other day, I was speaking with Josh and I was frustrated that we were going to be delayed in our adoption and didn't know when we would finally be able to add to our family. I felt like the Lord spoke to both of us in different ways but revealed the same truth: that His delay wasn't a denial. Nothing catches Him by surprise. We fully trust in His sovereignty. Everything He places in our lives is divinely orchestrated by the God of the universe. He makes no mistakes. Even these unfortunate circumstances and the timing will lead us to the baby that He has always meant for us to have.

We are stepping out by faith and our continuing our adoption journey. Please pray for us, pray for our baby and birth mother, and pray that God would restore what evil men have taken. If you feel led to give to our adoption, or know of someone who may, please share our story. You can click on the picture below to access our Go Fund Me page. We are trusting that God will provide everything we need. We love and appreciate you all.

Josh + Hannah

"For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor. No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly." ~ Psalm 84:11 


  1. I don't know you but I am praying.

  2. Wow. What a gut wrenching turn of events. No matter what, I know you'll find the baby God has for you. I'm sure this ordeal with cause you guys to clutch them even closer and cherish them even more when they are finally home with you both. My prayers are with your family!

  3. I saw your post as I am connected with Ryan and Rebekah Schlender; I cannot imagine the hurt, disappointment and sadness surrounding these events. Please know that I am praying for you.